I Ain't Gonna Lie...

Summer is a tough season for me. Not only will I never get used to southern humidity, but my kids are up with the rooster and don't go to bed until sundown. Add a neighbor kid or two and a couple of boxes of popsicles, and it's constant, sticky mayhem. We're pretty much stuck at home all day because it's hard to take Kate anywhere without her completely losing it. She's 5 months old and I keep waiting for her to turn a corner. She has been my fussiest baby by far.

If I do venture out, you wouldn't believe the comments I get because I have 4 kids. "Well, bless your heart" is the most polite. So I convinced Ryan that we needed to drop some coin if I was going to survive the summer. First we bought this big red-neck swimming pool.

It has a filter and I religiously dump in shock treatment and chlorine tablets, so I thought the water would stay pristine. But my kids get in and out so much that now it is a nice chocolate color due to the dirt surrounding the pool.

I call it the Water Hole and told the kids to keep their goggles on and mouths closed. Luckily kids don't care about cleanliness and things like that.

Our second purchase was this:

We got a great deal and the kids like it, but I am very disappointed. It's rickety and squeaky. Save up and buy one at Costco.

Four is not that many, right?

Riley's T-ball team took 3rd in tournament and in the fall he'll start machine pitch. He has been a huge help with Kate this summer. He plays with her and feeds her, and pushes the shopping cart for me at the store because I have to hold her the whole time.

Marissa had her first dance recital in May. I love dance, but she doesn't, so she's going to try soccer in the fall.

Sophie's new nickname is Giggles. She says the funniest things. On April 27 several tornadoes touched down in Northern Alabama. They were super scary and we spent most of the day hunkered down in my closet. When Ryan got home that night this was their conversation:

Sophie: Guess what, daddy? We had a volcano today!

Ryan: A volcano? You mean a tornado?

She paused and looked puzzled, then brightened.

Sophie: A volcano and a tornado!

Small potatoes compared to what happened to a lot of people. We are so blessed.

As you can probably tell by her thighs, Kate's nickname is no longer "The Runt." It's Baby Buggle Pants or Baby Buggles. Sometimes I call her Fussy Pants or Baby. No one calls her Kate. We survived RSV only to be in the hospital again a few weeks later because she has a severe milk allergy. Poor little baby has been through a lot in 5 short months.

Ryan has been working mucho overtime the past 3 months so we haven't seen much of him. I will say that he's back to his old tricks in the gift-giving department. Either that, or he is trying to give me subtle hints under the disguise as gifts.

First there was Christmas.

The gift: Silicon oven mitts. These babies can withstand heat up to 600F!

The pretense: Now you won't burn your hands getting corn on the cob out of boiling water!The translation: I cannot take one more Uncrustable for dinner. Please make something that requires the oven.

The result: I used them a few times, but they're too bulky and there's nowhere to store them. Not only that, they were like, 1o,oooth on my Christmas wish list, so there's a big Not Interested factor going on there.

On Mother's Day he got me 2 gifts.

Gift 1: An exercise DVD for our Kinect.

The pretense: You keep saying that you have nothing to wear. Use this DVD and you'll have a whole closet full!

The translation: Really, now, it's time to lose that baby weight.

The result: It's still in the original packaging. Not that I don't want to exercise, but it's near impossible to do it at home. There's too much laundry to do and too many fights to break up.

Gift 2: This book:

The pretense: Just an interesting book I picked up on the way home. I know how you love to read!

The translation: I want more kids but I know it's going to take a miracle for you to agree. Did the book convince you?

The result: Lemme think...NO! Although I will say that if you are on the fence about having more kids, you should definitely read the book. It's a good read regardless.

My birthday is coming up in a few months and I am going to lobby for a bigger house. Ours is bursting at the seams!

I congratulate you for making it through this post. I figure since the blog is dead 11 out of 12 months, I should go all out when I can.

Baby Kate

I started this post before the whole RSV nightmare, so it's a little outdated picture-wise, but I'll post some 6 week pictures soon (I promise, mom!).

My last time being pregnant. So huge and so glad it's over. Goodbye forever to heartburn, varicose veins, and swollen ankles!Baby Kate Elizabeth. Love at first sight.

We've taken pictures of all the kids just before leaving the hospital. Only a first-time mom would dress her newborn in a heavy snow suit just for the ride home. No wonder Riley screamed the whole way.

Marissa.

Sophie. She looked a lot like Riley, although you can't tell because of the snow suit. Their personalities are cut from the same cloth too.

And finally sweet baby Kate. She weighed 8 lbs. 5 oz. and was my smallest baby. She's still looks tiny to me and we call her our little runt. That's about the only nickname we have right now if you can believe it. Ryan needs to jump on it!

I think we ended on a good note, don't you?

RSV

Last Thursday, Kate came down with the sniffles. On Friday she began to cough like she'd been smoking for years, and that afternoon she was diagnosed with RSV. Then by Sunday her breathing was so rapid and erratic that I rushed her to the ER in the wee hours of Monday morning. RSV comes on fast and furious, and nothing is more terrifying than having a 3 week old who can't breathe. Nothing.

Kate was admitted to the Pediatric ICU, where specially trained nurses can monitor her at all times and where she's subjected to an IV, feeding tube, oxygen mask, and countless breathing treatments. Ryan and I have been blessed with an outpouring of friends and family offering support, meals, and child care. Strange, but no one has offered to clean our bathroom yet. Any takers? No? Well, I guess I can task that to my sister, who will be here tomorrow afternoon. (I can't wait!!)

Each night when I get home I resist the urge to break out the cleaning supplies. Sleep is more important than a mopped floor, I tell myself. But sleep doesn't come easily and a dirty house still irks me, despite the fact that my cleanliness standards have decreased significantly with the birth of each child. It's really not that I'm a clean freak. It's that I need something to distract me from the heartbreak of leaving Kate alone at the hospital, from coming home with empty arms.

Now we're just biding our time until she is strong enough to breathe on her own and all her"numbers" are at the right level. Then she'll be moved out to the floor, where Ryan or I will have to be with her 24 hours a day until she's well enough to come home.

Until then I am aching to hold her without the awkwardness of tubes and contraptions. I am angry at this virus that has robbed me of her newborn-ness, especially since she is my last baby and I intended to hold her non-stop as only a newborn will allow. But as the doctors and nurses keep reminding me, you can't rush RSV. There is no antibiotic or shot or drug that can speed up recovery. So for now we wait, and we pray, and when we can finally hold her again, we'll hold on tight.