Sunday, November 30, 2008

My Wish List (Ryan, this one's for you)

I deserve a fabulous present this year. Now, lest you think me too greedy, let's review a brief history of the Christmases Ryan and I have shared. I think you'll agree that I deserve a fabulous present this year.


Christmas 2001: This was our first married Christmas and we were dirt poor, so Ryan wanted to forgo presents for each other. I didn't think he was serious so I got him a VHS of the Hunt for Red October for 8 bucks at Walmart. Turns out he was serious and he got me nothing.


Christmas 2002: We spent Christmas in Montana with Ryan's family. We were still dirt poor, but I had just graduated and was banking on finding a job soon. I also didn't want to seem like a cheapskate in front of his family, so I bought him a nice (and expensive) sweater. He got me nada.


Christmas 2003: Yeah, I had a job but we were still poor, so we decided to do the no-present thing again. (For real this time.) On Christmas Eve I found a box with my name on it underneath the tree. Not to be outdone, I ran to the movie theater to purchase Lord of the Rings tickets to put under the tree for him. The next morning I opened my present to find an empty box with the word "Love" written inside. Sweet, yes. But once again, he got me zilch.


Christmas 2004-2006: Second verse, same as the first.


Christmas 2007: I got him a bunch of stocking stuffers and a nice shirt and tie. He got me a 3-hole puncher.



I share these stories not to villainize my darling husband whom I adore, but to merely point out that I deserve a fabulous present this year. Perhaps he just hasn't known what to get me in years past. This year he won't have that excuse.



1. New couches. Here is our current couch that will be used as firewood the second we get a new one.


It was originally my grandma's couch and she let us have it when we got married (which we were very grateful for). But now it's falling apart and very uncomfortable. The back leg is broken off so it tilts a little to the left. It's also quite embarrassing to have people over when the cushions look like this:




I don't mend, so that's not an option.


2. A music solution in our living room so we don't have to lug out this ghetto blaster every time we want to listen to music.






Then we have to place this huge book on the top so the CD player works.






3. A new kitchen floor. Our linoleum is peeling up big time. It looks horrible.



4. New cookware. I saw these at Costco.

I'm sure Bed Bath and Beyond has some nice ones too.




5. New clothes and shoes, although I will have to pick these out myself.


6. A new rug for my laundry room. I'm eyeing one at Kohl's that I will purchase in the after-Christmas sale if Santa doesn't pull through.


7. Professional carpet cleaning. White carpet and 3 kids don't mix, and with Sophie on the verge of crawling, it would be nice to have it cleaned. I've left coupons for this all over the house.



I hope you'll agree that I've made a solid argument for a nice present this year. And with gas practically free these days and our thermostat set at a chilly 68 degrees, we should have plenty of money for everything on my list.

PS. What not to get: jewelry, candy, stuffed teddy bears, or anything from Victoria's Secret.

21 comments:

Petunia said...

I was completely cracking up over this one. I agree-this is definitely your year for a stellar present. I hope Ryan saw the great pot set on sale half price at Kohls on Friday when he was picking up the rug :). I'll look forward to seeing what Santa leaves under the tree.

Anonymous said...

Careful, Ryan. I suggest you do as the lady says. Our reputation as men is on the line...

Janie said...

I'm crying over here from laughing so hard! I totally remember that box of "love" under the tree!! And I must agree - you really do need a new couch. That one from Grandma must be at least 20 years old and ready to petrify. And forget the carpet cleaning - I say you deserve all new carpet! Can't wait to hear what Christmas morning brings...

Quincy Sorensen said...

You crack me up. Now I'm waiting for the post-Christmas post about your fabulous present. Ryan will pull through, I'm sure.

Anonymous said...

That is too funny! :) I think Santa needs to re-check his list because you are waaaay behind in your fair share of toys! Can't wait to hear what he brings ya this year!

Lindsey said...

I love your posts Sara.

I think you deserve all of the items on your list. It will (kind of) make up for past years. Plus, all of your items are really necessities!

kmmclain said...

You are definitely deserving! Come on, you have given birth to 3 children, you stay home and take care of them, clean your house, make his food, do his laundry, etc.... This list is not asking for much. I hope you get it all!

Melissa said...

Ha, ha, ha! You are so funny! You and Ryan make such a great pair. I never even knew about the Love Box, how funny. You deserve many great gifts, especially now with Ryan making the big bucks. I hope you get a new couch and new pans, both of which are very much NEEDED!

Ryan said...

Sweetheart, I hope this post inspires sympathy in your readers for me! You don't like jewelry, candy or stuffed teddy bears (all of the easy gifts that husbands usually get for their wives) so I'm stuck trying to pick out pots (which I have no expertise with.) Oh, and, uh, about the "nothing from Victoria's Secret" part...too late! ;)

Mary Ann Carlile said...

Sara,
I think the answer to your problem is solved with what you already did. Make out a list that can, under every circumstances, be easily followed by a man. List exact name of item, price, and store location. Hand the list to hubby on Dec. 1st. Then post about it so the pressure is on, and see what happens Christmas morning;) (And I agree - you do deserve it ALL!)

kellibattraw said...

Sara you SO deserve several fantastic gifts! You guys crack me up. I can't wait to see what loot you rake in this year. : )

snbjork said...

Your posts always make me laugh! Too funny. And I'd say that Ryan has no excuse for getting you nothing this year. You've laid it all out on the line. Can't wait to see what he gets you! =)

Barry said...

Hey Ryan, you could get her a box of I Owe You's and then put if off another year. Or maybe you should get "her" a Wii. She would love it!

Sorry, Sara. Someone's got to at least somewhat defend Ryan. :)

ME ME ME said...

ha ha you make me laugh. I always knew my brother was a cheapsake when it came to presents but I had NO IDEA that you have gotten nothing but a 3-hole punch in the 7years you have been married. That would not fly with any other girl. I hope he gets you ALL OF THEM! You didnt even ask for stuff for yourself, but for the house. I cant wait to see you guys in 2 days!

Kristi said...

Oh, my sweet Sara, I will be a witness for you in this case - you deserve a fab present! You crack me up with the ghetto blaster. Ha!

Jessica said...

I just had to tell you that this might be one of my favorite blogs posts ever. Michael wouldn't make it to another Christmas if he pulled something like this! I'm hoping to get some new pots & pans early next year, so if you still need some (and based on your track-record, my guess is that you will!), your welcome to have mine!

Marshall's said...

Sara! Hi. It's Courtney. I miss you! Hope you are doing well this holiday season. Maybe we can keep in touch through blogs!

Wendyrful said...

Sara, I hope you get something great (off your list) for Chirstmas this year! You deserve to have something under the tree, or to sit on or something.

ME ME ME said...

So....we're all dying to know what you got for Christmas?!?!

Petunia said...

So I'm anxious to know what you ended up with :).

Kristi said...

So we are all (my sisters) wondering what you got this year for Christmas. Come on update this thing :)

Love ya