100 Things

I've seen this done and challenged myself to think of 100 publish-worthy things about me. I don't know if I succeeded, but here it goes:


1. I used to be able to do the splits.

2. My favorite kind of fruit are Jonathan apples that only come out in the fall. Unfortunately, Walmart doesn't sell them so I can only buy them when I go to Target.

3. I was a shamelessly devoted fan of The O.C. for all 4 seasons. Who can resist the geeky but hilarious Seth Cohen?

4. I got my first kiss in Las Vegas. I was 19.

5. My mom did my hair until I was 17. No wonder I have no idea how to do it now.

6. If there's no chap stick or lotion in heaven, I'll choose hell.

7. I am not a napper.

8. I hate camping. There, I said it.

9. I wish I were a better mom. You know, the supermom type who make their kids' Halloween treat buckets out of paper mache and have every second of their lives documented on video and/or scrapbooks.

10. Cleaning baseboards is my least favorite household chore. I would rather clean 100 toilets.

11. I talk to my sister on the phone every day. We both need the company and we're on the same network.

12. I don't like drinking water unless it's cold, preferably ice cold. With lots and lots of ice. The crushed kind you get at gas stations is my favorite. It melts in your mouth.

13. I never once sluffed school. Even in college, I only ditched one class, one time freshman year. I guess you could say that I'm a little goody two shoes.

14. My favorite animal was a poodle we had growing up named Jumper. I loved that dog, but now I don't really like animals and don't want any pets. Go figure.

15. I think the no pet thing comes from Ryan. Once a co-worker was looking for someone to take care of his dog while he was in Europe. Ryan said, "I'll take care of him for you. Permanently."

16. The one frivolous thing I'm going to buy if I win the lottery is a boat.

17. Well, maybe some new clothes too. Most of mine are (sigh) from high school or college before I got married.

18. I used to want to name my first daughter Cora. Oh, how I laugh at that now.

19. I wrote in my journal religiously every night starting from when I was a senior in high school until I got married.

20. If you cut me open, you'd find that I'm 1/4 peanut butter (creamy Jif, precisely). Ironically, the taste or smell of it when I'm pregnant makes me gag.

21. I don't miss the mountains as much as I thought I would.

22. Fall is my favorite season. I enjoy raking leaves and eating Jonathan apples.

23. If you want to make me cry, force me to wear a turtleneck.

24. If I have to sing Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree one more time I think I might self-combust.

21. I love nutella. (It's especially good on top of peanut butter.) If you put me and it in a room together you'd have an empty jar in about an hour.

22. The best sound ever is my kids laughing those big belly laughs. Second best? The garage door opening signaling that daddy's home. Third best? Thunderstorms.

23. Biggest accomplishment to date: Keeping a straight face when, during bedtime prayer, Riley said, "Please bless that we can eat cake and brownies."

24. It rained on our wedding day and we had an outside reception. Everyone said it's good luck, and so far I think they're right.

25. I don't own one pair of high heels. I would break my ankle if I did.

26. The most recent Neftlix movie we saw was Big Trouble. If you haven't seen, make sure you never, ever do. If you have, I'm so sorry.

27. Easter candy is my favorite candy, especially Cadbury eggs. Ryan recently confessed that until we got married he thought there was real egg yolk in them. I bet they'd still be yummy even if it were true.

28. Two summers and two garden failures later, I have finally conceded that I do not have a green thumb.

29. I would never admit this to anyone, but if asked point blank I could not deny that our old nasty couch is nothing more than millions of dust mites holding hands.

30. I wish Ryan would let me buy flannel sheets. I love them, even in the summer.

31. I don't have OCD or anything, but I am picky when it comes to towels. I won't use a community hand towel and if someone has used my hand towel I have to get another one. And wet towels in general? Ewwww.

32. My favorite book is Les Miserables.

33. My favorite young adult book is Trick or Treat. I've read it so many times I've lost count and I'm still not sick of it. If you want to borrow it, just give me a holler.

34. I listen to Sarah McLachlan when I'm sad or stressed. Her voice calms me somehow.

35. I prefer bar soap over body wash.

36. Ryan and I both promised to get remarried if the other dies. This did not surprise Ryan's co-worker, who said, "Parker? Yeah, he'd take a date to the funeral."

37. My favorite girl scout cookies are Samoas.

38. I hate stepping on wet surfaces with bare feet. The worst is the shower area of any gym. If I forgot my flip flops, you can bet your bottom dollar that I won't be getting anywhere near the locker room.

39. A bookstore is the only place that I have ever wished I drank coffee.

40. When I was little I used to write articles for a make-believe newspaper. My pen name was Ricky Henderson.

41. I'm ashamed to admit that I took 3 years of Spanish in high school and 4 semesters in college, and still I can barely count to 10.

42. Not a day goes by that I do not wish I lived closer to my family.

43. Marissa's middle name is Cynthia, after my mom. I could not think of a more appropriate person to name my daughter after.

44. I went to Egypt for a week when I was in Jerusalem for study abroad. I would never go back.

45. I would, however, love to go back to Jerusalem. I miss the feeling of the old city, and hearing the call to prayer.

46. When our kids are older we are going to go on a Disney cruise.

47. Our next car will be a minivan, and I can't wait.

48. I worked at the law library in college, where my co-workers nicknamed me Punctual Parker. I hate being late. I also hate when other people are late. Too bad my husband doesn't have a problem with either.

49. I love spy movies, like the Bourne trilogy, but I also love How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days and Sweet Home Alabama.

50. It scares me that I have started to pick up Southern slang like "fixin'" and "holler." Apparently, though, I can't be considered a true Southerner until I've eaten fried catfish and I'm sure that will never happen.

51. I really, really doubt I could live without my cell phone.

52. My hair was straight before I had kids. Now it's super curly but just in the back. It's horrible.

53. Clutter annoys me. I throw stuff out the first chance I get.

54. I named my first bike Sally. She had a pink and white banana seat and a pink basket on the front.

55. I despise texting. I guess it's a good thing I'm not a teenager or I'd have no source of communication.

56. One of my favorite songs of all time is Flake by Jack Johnson.

57. Changing my own kids' diapers doesn't really bother me at all. Other people's kids' diapers are another story.

58. I am not embarrassed to admit that come the first day of school, there will be a skip in my step rather than a tear in my eye as I walk home from the bus stop.

59. What I wouldn't give for a personal trainer.

60. I've never had a pedicure but would really, really love one.

61. You'd never believe the number of times I've been asked if my middle name is Jessica.

62. I was named after my grandad's grandmother, Sarah Ann. Except I'm Sara Anne.

63. Monday is cleaning day. The house gets trashed on the weekend, so what better way to start the week?

64. I put ketchup on my tacos and thought everyone did until Ryan told me it was weird.

65. I have a bachelor's degree in English from BYU with an emphasis in editing.

65. My minor is in TESOL (teaching English as a second language). It was a pointless minor, but they didn't have an editing minor at the time. They do now.

66. I have all my homework and lecture notes from college sitting in a big box in the shed. It's one of the few things I can't bring myself to throw away. Yet.

67. The first apartment Ryan and I rented didn't have a heater. In the morning there would be ice on the dishes that we washed the night before.

68. I'm hardly ever the perfect temperature. It seems like I'm always either freezing or burning.

69. We rarely call our kids by their given names. Riley is Bruiser, Bruise, or Bruisy and Marissa is Sissy or Sister McSusan.

70. One of the hardest things about being a mom is determining what is just a phase and what's going to be a habit.

71. I'm not huge on romance. Ryan's off the hook when it comes to flowers, jewelry, and giant teddy bears.

72. I wish I were more spontaneous. I've tried, but it's just not in my bones.

73. Giving up piano is one of my biggest regrets.

74. Kirk Cameron was my biggest crush all throughout the Growing Pains years.

75. I wanted to be an astronaut when I grew up.

76. I had mono in college.

77. One of my biggest gripes is when people wear overpowering perfume or cologne. It gives me a headache.

78. It took me many years to discover that Napoleon ice cream is really Neapolitan ice cream.

79. I wish my feet were a size 7. I wear a 9, and whenever I see a shoe I like and they bring it out in my size, I never like it anymore.

80. I'm not a big risk taker. I have no desire to bungee jump or skydive or do any other extreme sports.

81. I cringe when I see pictures of myself in junior high wearing overalls and a flannel shirt around my waist.

82. I've learned there is a difference between rewards and bribes. I think most seasoned moms have known this for years.

83. Speaking correct English is important to me. It hurts my ears when I hear things like, "Me and him", "They was", "I ain't", etc.

84. I've never been tanning.

85. Ryan and I are are debating what to put in the Christmas stockings this year. In his family the stockings were filled with candy. In my family they were filled with practical things like makeup and nylons.

86. I get car sick, bus sick, train sick, you name it. I also get sick on 90% of the rides at amusement parks.

87. My first job was working part-time at a snack bar at a swimming pool.

88. I only wore braces for 9 months.

89. I can name all 50 state capitals. Just ask me.

90. Shopping makes me happy.

91. I went rock climbing once, and my arms hurt for 3 weeks afterward. Apparently you're supposed to use your legs more.

92. Garage sales make me crazy. Spending all day looking through junk just to find one good deal is unfathomable.

93. Chinese jump rope was one of my favorite games growing up.

94. I don't know how to french braid.

95. I played softball for several years. My favorite position was first base. My least favorite was catcher.

96. Cran-apple is my beverage of choice on airplanes.

97. I never skip breakfast.

98. I don't understand guys and video games. What's all the hoopla about?

99. By the end of book 3 I was hopelessly in love with a vampire named Edward Cullen.

100. I never, ever thought I'd have 3 kids ages 3 and under.